3 Ways to Start Giving Yourself the Credit You Deserve
Have You Been There?The moment you step out of the bed
You are overcome with a sense of doom as you're hit with a litany of THINGS TO DO.
The house needs cleaning. The laundry needs washing. You're behind at work, and you have yet to call in a repair person to fix that nagging issue in your home.
Meanwhile, the work you actually completed, the quality time you spent with a loved one, the motivation you mustered to just complete one of the many things on your TO-DO list are quickly thrown into the sea of forgetfulness.
Never to be remembered
(until somebody else wants to credit for them. I digress)
Suddenly, you feel like you’ve gotten nothing done
And the self-berating begins.
Why is this?
Because so often we give more weight to the un-done than the done.
We live in a culture that keeps pressing for more.
And we've been taught “good enough” is never really enough.
As a recovering perfectionist, I know this song and dance all too well.
Shamed by the un-done.
Overlooking what was actually done.
Listen, sis, I want you to know you have a life worth celebrating TODAY.
But if you're not feeling that way today, I want to share three practical ways to shift that nice-sounding affirmation above from a nice idea to actionable steps you can take today.
- Create a habit of giving yourself more credit than you "should". Listen, most people are not going to give you the credit you deserve. They are not going to acknowledge your lost sleep, missed meals, and extra effort you put into getting everything done. Your boss, your husband, kids, and maybe even your friends, often don’t acknowledge a fraction of what it took to get that finished product they're benefiting from. Sis, stop waiting. Pull out your receipts. You are doing amazing things. EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. Just holding it together is often a masterful performance. Cue the applause. Now, I want you to literally make a habit of writing it down. Keep a running list of what you’ve done each week, not just professionally, but personally. If you went the whole day (or a couple of hours) without putting yourself down, write that down. If you prioritized your well-being this week and set a boundary, you betta’ celebrate that. If you had an opportunity to be in the present moment for yourself or a friend, celebrate that. If you are strengthening your relationship with the Lord, you better give yourself a high-five. Sis, make it a habit of giving yourself credit before anyone ever has a chance to. You are rocking it! Recognize it, even when “they” don’t.
- Rewrite the narrative of what truly matters. Yes, making money matters, but let me tell you something, so many other things matter more. Is there an area of your life you’ve overemphasized to the detriment of another? Many times, there’s a mismatch between what others expect of you and what's truly important to you. Sis, if it's important to you, it's important, Period, even if it doesn't matter to a single solitary other person. So, take a moment and write down YOUR top 3-5 priorities each week and measure your progress against those. If yours don't align with others' priorities for you, a shift may need to take place with whom you are aligning yourself. But you'll never know until you get really clear about what's truly important to YOU.
- Start a Wisdom Journal Sis, you've been through a lot, but you've also learned a lot. The thing is when we don't take inventory of lessons learned, either we tend to repeat them, or worse, not really learn from them. So, this is really important. I want you to think about how you’ve grown in the last 12 months. What lessons have you learned? What wisdom have you gained? Wisdom is invaluable and worthy of great celebration. You did that!
Listen, you've come a long way baby! You may not be where you ultimately want to be, but you're closer. Give yourself permission to reflect on just how far you’ve come. I promise you’re farther than when you started. It’s time to make that affirmation at the top of this post more than a cute little saying. You have the power to stop diminishing the steps you've already taken…on purpose and without apology. You deserve the celebration, sis!
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